Author Topic: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]  (Read 7014 times)

Joshex

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[[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« on: June 22, 2013, 03:05:55 AM »
dear titan network, I come today to bring you a fair warning, tortilla chips over 8 years old spawn a living toxin, the scent and flavor is musky and strong.

upon consumption mild indigestion occurs only to subside for serveral hours after which the fever hits, soon you will have diarrhea and become delerious, next the toxin will reproduce in a watery mass in your bowels and your delerium will cause you to passout, when you wake up you may feel like you need to vomit but you wont, instead you will look forwards to repeat visits to the toilet for increasingly more intensive diarrhea.

stay tuned for a progress report on the symptoms to come and how quickly or long you can expect to gain relief.

in the mean time I again warn DO NOT eat tortilla chips that are over 8 years old, even 3 years old is probably not a good idea.

[[EDIT: FIXED TITLE OMGAHHHHHHGHGHGHGHHHHHH ~Agge]]
« Last Edit: June 22, 2013, 05:36:59 AM by Joshex »
There is always another way. But it might not work exactly like you may desire.

A wise old rabbit once told me "Never give-up!, Trust your instincts!" granted the advice at the time led me on a tripped-out voyage out of an asteroid belt, but hey it was more impressive than a bunch of rocks and space monkies.

houtex

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #1 on: June 22, 2013, 04:53:01 AM »
diarrhea*

He's comin' up to bat, and his pants are gettin' fat
Diarrhea uh uh, Diarrhea uh uh.

He's runnin' on to first, and his pants just want to burst
Diarrhea uh uh, Diarrhea uh uh.

He's goin' round to second, and he needs a disinfectant
Diarrhea uh uh, Diarrhea uh uh.

He's comin' up to third, and he wishes it was a t***
Diarrhea uh uh, Diarrhea uh uh.

He's comin' on to home, and his pants have got some foam
Diarrhea uh uh, Diarrhea uh uh.

You may think it's funny, but it's really brown and runny
Diarrhea uh uh, Diarrhea uh uh.

/Right.  Juvenile toilet humor expunged.  Now I feel better.
//On a personal note... sympathize, Josh.  I can't eat onions, garlic, bell peppers, or chiles ever again, or I get this reaction.  Fully two days you might see me again.  Ugh.  Be strong and drink fluids.

Tenzhi

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #2 on: June 22, 2013, 05:41:24 AM »
dear titan network, I come today to bring you a fair warning, tortilla chips over 8 years old spawn a living toxin, the scent and flavor is musky and strong.

So, the chips being 8 years old and smelling/tasting wrong wasn't warning enough to keep one from eating them?

I hope you get better ASAP, but if it didn't sound like you were being punished more than enough I'd suggest having someone smack you upside the head once or twice. ;P
When you insult someone by calling them a "pig" or a "dog" you aren't maligning pigs and dogs everywhere.  The same is true of any term used as an insult.

Taceus Jiwede

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #3 on: June 22, 2013, 07:34:38 AM »
Lol that's pretty funny Joshex.  Although I think generally speaking as a rule of thumb you shouldn't eat anything 8 years old, you'll probably get sick.

dwturducken

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #4 on: June 22, 2013, 09:56:30 AM »
I had to re-read that three times before I figured out you weren't feeding chips to an 8 year old.
I wouldn't use the word "replace," but there's no word for "take over for you and make everything better almost immediately," so we just say "replace."

Captain Electric

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #5 on: June 22, 2013, 10:13:31 AM »
Wait, Joshex is eating eight year-olds? LOL what will he think of next? Crazy guy.

But seriously. Wanna meet my nephew?

Turjan

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #6 on: June 22, 2013, 12:40:08 PM »
Better watch out - he'll wind up getting super toxin powers off those toritilla chips and come back here posting as El Imentary, a supervillain with a colon hell bent on world domination!

dwturducken

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #7 on: June 22, 2013, 02:57:32 PM »
I don't know about anyone else, but, when my colon goes all supervillainy, it's more like it's hell-bent on eradicating all life and terraforming the planet for its own kind...

Just sayin'.
I wouldn't use the word "replace," but there's no word for "take over for you and make everything better almost immediately," so we just say "replace."

Arachnion

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #8 on: June 22, 2013, 03:35:15 PM »
Oh Joshex.

Shine on, you crazy diamond you.

8)
I'm all dressed up with nowhere to go
Walkin' with a dead man over my shoulder

Waiting for an invitation to arrive
Goin' to a party where no one's still alive

Joshex

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #9 on: June 22, 2013, 05:51:07 PM »
dreams were crazy last night and long, body didn't want to let me wake up. stomach seems ok for now but I can tell theres still something there..

I didn;t know the chips were that old lol, I saw an open (and clipped) bag of tortilla chips on top of my grandad's fridge, I had just had tacos the previosu night and there was some leftovers but no shells, so I thought I'd have a taco salad, and I was hungry, like super hungry.

so, I ate them, and then I paid the price. I told my gradad about them and put them ontop of the garbage can. guess what? they are back ontop of the fridge now!

still have a mild fever, head is spinny
There is always another way. But it might not work exactly like you may desire.

A wise old rabbit once told me "Never give-up!, Trust your instincts!" granted the advice at the time led me on a tripped-out voyage out of an asteroid belt, but hey it was more impressive than a bunch of rocks and space monkies.

houtex

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #10 on: June 22, 2013, 06:12:31 PM »
Better watch out - he'll wind up getting super toxin powers off those toritilla chips and come back here posting as El Imentary, a supervillain with a colon hell bent on world domination!

An evil Spleen.  Nice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m9rBv4Dn3Bk

TriNitroToluene

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #11 on: June 23, 2013, 10:22:34 PM »
Perhaps, when you feel better, you should just throw them away for ole gramps.  Frugality can be a double-edged sword.

Joshex

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #12 on: June 24, 2013, 01:04:50 AM »
Perhaps, when you feel better, you should just throw them away for ole gramps.  Frugality can be a double-edged sword.

yeah as soon as I was better I dumped them out. I'll not eat those agian lol.
There is always another way. But it might not work exactly like you may desire.

A wise old rabbit once told me "Never give-up!, Trust your instincts!" granted the advice at the time led me on a tripped-out voyage out of an asteroid belt, but hey it was more impressive than a bunch of rocks and space monkies.

houtex

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #13 on: June 24, 2013, 02:56:59 AM »
Wait... if you didn't throw them out, you might have eaten them again?  'Cause that's what it sounded like. 

Although, to be honest, when I'm devouring a bag of chips I shouldn't, and I realize I have had enough, and I *really* need to not eat them anymore... into the trash.  I won't dig 'em out, so they're like poison at that point.

So... I call good strategy on throwing them out.  Less temptation that way.

/em thumbsup

Mister Bison

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #14 on: June 24, 2013, 06:31:26 AM »
[Achievement: Joshex has Bow(e)ls of steel !]

Though, Joshex, you could use some dicernment. You could kill yourself with such things. Don't underestimate rotten food.

But while I knew that, (well, I think i do,) thanks for the warning.
Yeeessss....

dwturducken

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #15 on: June 24, 2013, 03:15:31 PM »
I was tempted to make a Double Flusher badge, but I just couldn't get wording that wasn't a terrible punfest. :)
I wouldn't use the word "replace," but there's no word for "take over for you and make everything better almost immediately," so we just say "replace."

Ironwolf

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #16 on: June 26, 2013, 04:55:49 PM »
Mercy Flush badge.

Hyperstrike

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #17 on: June 26, 2013, 06:10:36 PM »
Scrubbin' bubbles
FER PEOPLE!


And don't put them ON TOP of the garbage can.
Put them IN the garbage can!

healix

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #18 on: June 29, 2013, 04:14:06 AM »
Listen to the 'mustn'ts'. Listen to the 'don'ts'. Listen to the 'shouldn'ts', the 'impossibles', the 'won'ts'. Listen to the 'you'll never haves', then listen close to me... Anything can happen . Anything can be.

Aggelakis

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Re: [[OMGAHHHHHHFHFHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH.... ~Agge]]
« Reply #19 on: June 29, 2013, 04:24:04 AM »
I love how his fingers don't even touch his tongue and he starts wiggin' out. Tennant<3
Bob Dole!! Bob Dole. Bob Dole! Bob Dole. Bob Dole. Bob Dole... Bob Dole... Bob... Dole...... Bob...


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